Monday, April 14, 2014

And Even More Funniest Facebook Statuses

You all seem depressed, precious readers.  Depressed and angry and bitter.  And afraid of bears.  Hopefully, posting your statuses will earn all of you a well-deserved hug.

But not by a bear.

And Even More Funniest Facebook Statuses

  1. If the person who has stolen all of my left socks would please step forward, I will promise that your death will be quick and painless.
  2. The response to tonight's Cosmos should probably not be my excitement that I could have a lecture hall with a bowling ball pendulum to swing into the audience.
  3. Every time another committee meeting is announced, I get the quiet urge to dump hot tea on someone’s genitals.  This is perfectly normal, right?
  4. I keep telling y'all to watch out for bears.
  5. That's right. Filed my taxes the day BEFORE they were due.
  6. OK, I want a bunch o' remote-controlled Roman Chariots.
  7. We need more Python-influenced public policy.
  8. Sudoku is a life skill?
  9. I sprouted a ladder from my chest.
  10. It’s just me, a dripping faucet, and hundreds and hundred of bluebooks.  And hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of bluebooks.

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