My Doctor: "Well, everything looks good. Do you have any concerns?"
Me: "I did hear about this thing called a thundershirt, and I wondered if they make them for people."
My Doctor: "What is a thundershirt?"
Me: "It's this shirt that you put on dogs to make them less anxious during thunderstorms. Ever since the giant poplar tree fell on my house, I get very upset during thunderstorms. So I am thinking that I could use a shirt like that."
My Doctor: "There are meds you can take, but unless this is causing genuine panic attacks..."
Me: "No, no! I want a thundershirt. It's supposed to reduce anxiety without meds, plus I could yell at the sky and say, 'You can't get me! I'm wearing a thundershirt!'"
My Doctor: "Why don't you just take an old t-shirt and write thundershirt on it with a sharpie? Then you can shout all you like."
Me: "You know, that is not a bad idea at all. You're a better doctor than I thought you were."
My Doctor: "You are a very interesting patient. Very interesting."