Voice: "Hello? Is this Dr. Natalie?"
Me: "No, this is Dr. Grinnell. If I meet Dr. Natalie, I'll tell her you called."
Voice: "Hello. Is this Dr. Grinnell?"
Me: "It is. How may I help you?"
Voice: "I represent a publishing company, the [publisher I've never heard of]. We are looking for textbook proposals..."
Me: "Excellent! I'm glad you called. I would like to propose that I write a textbook on how to avoid telemarketers."
Voice: "That does not seem to be an academic textbook, but if you would like to write a proposal..."
Me: "I could put goats in it."
Voice: "Excuse me. Did you say goats?"
Me: "Telemarketers are a serious problem for goats. But in order to emphasize the importance of this issue to academics around the world, we could include photos of the goats. Naked photos."
Voice: "I am not sure you are understanding the kind of company I represent."
Me: "You would like the goats to wear loincloths? I don't think they'd like that, but I could try...<click>...hello?"
Voice: "Hello. This is [still haven't heard of it or found it on the internet] Publishers. May I speak to Dr. Natalie Grinnell who is a professor, please?"
Me: "You've changed your mind about the naked goats!"