Saturday, January 25, 2014

Real Conversation with Mom: There is Something Behind the Castle and I Have Jellylegs

Mom:  Alright, I need you to do something for me.  I've been waiting for two whole weeks while you were in Prague.  Okay?  Say you will do this for your mother?

Me: Ferbleargh.

Mom:  What was that?  Did you come home with a cold?!  Stop that!  Now this is serious and scary.

Me:  Schary?

Mom:  Oh, get a cough drop!  Scary!

Me:  Okay, what is it?

Mom:  The cats keep staring at the cat castle.

Me:  They are cats.

Mom:  I think there's something behind it.  A mouse or a snake.  Go look and find out.

Me:  No.

Mom:  Yes!  I am too scared to do it!  You go find out...look, Leia is staring at it right now!

Me:  The cats are psychopaths trying to bend us to their will.  I will not be moved.

Mom:  Look behind that castle right now!

Me:  No.  I am snuggling on the couch with my tea and two weeks of the Daily Show and this cold.  If there is a snake there, leave it alone.

Mom:  You are a terrible daughter.  Just because you have jellylegs, you think you can get away with this.

Me:  Once again, I have no idea what you're talking about.

Mom:  Jellylegs!  Jockylegs?  Whatever you got on the plane!  Go find out what is behind the castle.

Me:  No, I will not.  I have the jetlag and a cold and a lack of Jon Stewart.  Do it yourself. 

Mom:  I am going to call Alyce and Watt, and they will tell you that you are a bad daughter.

Me:  Fine. 

Mom:  I should have dropped you on your head harder when you were a baby.


  1. "The cats are psychopaths trying to bend us to their will." Indeed. It's just the cats.

  2. HAhahahahahahahahahahahhaaha! I so look forward to these posts, and they never disappoint. I'm sorry you got a cold in Prague, though! :(