Me: "The one in the middle."
Mom: "I can't remember that. We need to put names on them."
Me: "No, we don't. I alphabetized them."
Mom: "No you did not. You cannot alphabetize Christmas stockings!"
Me: "Yes, you can. They go from left to right: Gretchen, Isabella, Peter."
Mom: "That is the stupidest thing I ever heard. Did you alphabetize all of the decorations?"
Me: "Of course not. Some are organized by irony."
Mom: "By what?"
Me: "Irony. It's why the Christmas mice are sitting on the cats' medieval castle."
|Castle Mice for Christmas|
Mom: "There is something wrong with you. Shut up now and fetch me the egg nog!"