Mom: Look what they're doing to that pig!
Me (glancing up from grading): It's surfing.
Mom: That's terrible! That pig does not look happy.
Me: It's surfing.
Mom: Does that pig look happy to you?
Me: I am not an expert on the facial expressions of pigs.
Mom: Wait a minute. [pause] Wait a minute. [pause] I've got to think up some smart ass answer to that...
